weeellll I woke up super late this morning which isn’t good as I had morning plans. But whatever. I got up, went straight to the scale, weight myself and then stood there for 10 minutes while the scale refused to read me. Conversation:
“Wtf scale !?”
“308 307 309 306 309 306 307”
“WTF SCALE!?!?!?”
“ERROR”
awesome.
I walked back into my room, sat for a moment, grumbled to myself about not even really being hungry but having to drink my breakfast (i’m never really hungry in the mornings although I’m fully aware that breakfast is the most important meal of the day) and then boom morning tinkle time hit.
Let me take a moment and let you know that this “cleanse” Reset has been less screaming on a toilet begging for bowel mercy type of cleanse but more hey.. i feel less heavy.. hah!
I went to the bathroom. (TMI? tuff tatas.)
I then pulled out the scale again and then pulled out the backup fact checker scale which is almost exactly a pound off. The fact checker is actually a pound less but I go by my fancy digital scale which is always a pound heavier. I don’t know which one is actually the most accurate. regardless, I always take the bigger number. Don’t know why!
“Ok scales, you better work this time” I say out loud standing in my bathroom naked.
“308.2 307.9 306.8 306.2 ”
Okay… final number 306.2 I can take that.
I step on the fact checker “305.8” BOOM.
I make this face and curse up a blue streak: 0_o
I get on my fancy schmancy digital again “306.8”
Fact Checker “305.4”
SONOFABITCH!
Digi: 306.8
Fact Checker: 306.8
BOOM!!!! so I’m takin that as a win.
I now weigh 306.8 which means:
I’VE LOST 5.4 LBS IN 3 DAYS.
take that, fat! 😀 you can suck it! I’m 6.8 lbs from being under 300 lbs!!!! do you have any idea what that feels like!?!? no!?!? well let me tell ya!
HOLY SHIT AMAZEBALLS GOODNESS!!! it’s like winning the lottery sleeping with Gary Oldman from Dracula (not the old buttcrack victory roll hair dracula but the young hot long hair mustache of champions Vlad the impaler dracula) and Google calling me to tell me they wanna hire me for anything I want and move me to Palo Alto. THAT KINDA GOOD.
I don’t even know what to say. which is kinda a big fat lie because I never stop talking.
Regardless there ya go. so it works if you stick to it. I mean at least the first 3 days did.
I noticed today that as I was shaking my breakfast in the kitchen, that I actually missed real food. and not shit food like fast food, but real food. like baked chicken and broiled fish and oddly enough more veggies. I missed being able to eat more veggies.
“Have you lost your cotton pickin’ mind!?” you ask?
Yes. Yes I have. or at least the change has started within my brains to tell me that guess what?? you don’t have to eat like a jackass to enjoy good. Tasting the good stuff will always be better than engorging yourself on the bad. man what I wouldn’t do for a lean steak just 4 oz. they don’t even sell 4 oz at restaurants. It’s so ridiculous. Anyway, so I am blogging early to let you know that my hump day is freakin fantastic.
oh and I promise to do the elliptical post! 😀
Foody Call 